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We were going to call this New & Improved Anti-Gravity Mints, but somehow that didn't seem right because we didn't improve them at all. In fact, we intentionally made them less powerful. You see, our old Anti-Gravity Mints formula simply worked too well -- we had trouble keeping them in stock. Not because they were selling that well, but cases of them were levitating off our warehouse shelves and out through the skylight. And when we did sell them, new problems arose. Customer after customer floated away, never to purchase from us -- or anyone else -- again. Talk about your bad business model! (We briefly considered offering free anchors with each purchase, but we dropped that idea, UPS rates being what they are.) So we were forced to re-formulate the recipe for Anti-Gravity Mints and make them more subtle. They're just as delicious as they always were, and still come in a really cool comic-book style tin. But now their anti-gravity effect is very, very subtle. We're not sure if you'll come back and buy more, but we know you'll be able to!
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